Moral Lessons

What Influences a Person’s Moral Compass?

According to Dr. Todd Hall, all human beings are born with a moral compass. We all have that innate sense of what is right and wrong. As we grow older, those instincts may grow or fade or become so twisted and corrupted.

You see, a person’s moral compass is influenced by their life experiences, the environment they grew up in as well as many other factors.

As young children, our parents tell us what we should or shouldn’t do. We look up to them and learn from their actions. This gives us a basic concept of what is right and wrong. But what really hones that concept is the desire to please our parents and the people we look up to.

I mean, if you ask a child to lie, chances are they’ll tell you they won’t do it because it’s bad. But from that, you can also see their fear of disappointing their parents. They don’t want to tell lies because they know their parents will get angry at them. They know that their actions will have consequences. That’s how a person’s moral compass is formed.

As we grow old, the lessons we learned from our experiences can either strengthen or weaken our childhood values. We adapt to our environment and with that comes inevitable changes. We cease to become the person that our parents raised us to be. Instead, we forge our own identities with a unique set of moral principles and beliefs. These moral values determine our moral compass.

How to Use Your Moral Compass

If we look at the dictionary’s definition of moral compass, it has two elements:

• it’s the ability to determine what is right and wrong
• act accordingly

This means that your moral compass will only work if you act on it. You need to allow it to guide you when making decisions no matter how small it is.

According to this article, there are three basic steps to using your moral compass:

1. Gather Information

Don’t just rely on what you know to make a decision. Gather as much relevant information as you can. That way, you can view the situation from different angles and foresee possible consequences.

These pieces of information can be from a previous similar experience and what you’ve learned from it. They can also be from other people’s opinions or even the moral standards set by society. You also need to look at your values and your understanding of what needs to be done.

2. Evaluate Your Information

After you have all that you need to know, you need to evaluate those pieces of information. From there, you can formulate a response that will not only fit your values but also will not cause harm to others.

3. Decide and Act

Once you’ve made a decision, make sure to act on it. Be firm but don’t forget to empathize. Remember that your actions will affect not just you but others too. So consider your decision carefully. There will always be risks to every decision. You can’t always predict what will happen after you do something. But if you follow your moral compass and stand firm for what is right, then that is good enough.

Moral Values vs. Ethics

Most of the time, we confuse moral values with ethics. Though they are dependent on each other, they’re quite different.

As mentioned, moral values guide a person to act on what is right and good for everyone. While ethics is the willingness to do the right thing no matter the cost. In short, ethics is moral values put into action.

For instance, moral values like justice tell a person to fight for what is right. But an ethical person will not just stand by and watch when an injustice is happening. They will do something to correct it even if it endangers their life.

This is why moral values without ethics are useless and ethics wouldn’t exist without moral values. Knowing what to do is different from actually doing it. But you cannot do the right thing if you can’t tell the difference between right and wrong.

Moral Values vs. Core Values

While moral values are fundamental to human existence, core values can best be defined as a set of principles and beliefs that are fundamental to a person’s identity. Meaning, they differ from one person to another.

Moral values and core values often overlap with each other and some values can both be a person’s moral and core values. Courage, for instance, is a moral value if used to protect and improve humanity. But it can also be a person’s core value if being courageous defines them as a person.

Most of the time, our core values can also go beyond the moral values that are regulated by social norms. Discipline and perseverance, for example, are some of a hardworking person’s core values. But they are not necessarily universal nor fundamental to human existence.

Examples of Moral Values

I’ve already mentioned several examples of moral values above. But the most important ones are:

1. Compassion

There is no question that compassion is one of those values that are vital to human existence. Without it, no society can thrive. It’s the antidote to selfishness and the beginning of selflessness. This is why it’s one of the most important moral values and one that we should definitely inculcate in the next generation.

2. Respect

They say that “respect begets respect” but respect as a moral value isn’t born out of reciprocity. Rather, it’s given out of that innate sense of morality telling you that it’s the right thing to do. In short, you respect someone not because they are respectful to you. You respect them because you know it’s what you should do. Respect, as a value, means respecting everyone regardless of how they treat you.

3. Honesty

The famous quote that says “honesty is the best policy” couldn’t be any more true. Honesty is fundamental to building trust, bridging gaps, and strengthening relationships. 

4. Gratitude

 Practicing gratitude is the beginning of happiness. When you are thankful for everything you have, you start to appreciate your blessings. You don’t see what you lack anymore. Instead, you become content with what you have. That’s why if you dream of a happier world, you need to start teaching your children the importance of keeping an attitude of gratitude.

5. Generosity

In the dictionary, generosity is defined as the willingness to give or help more than what is expected. But as a value, generosity is also about giving without expecting anything in return. It reminds us of our social responsibility to help those who are not able to help themselves. Because if you only give to people because you know they can return the favor someday, then that’s not generosity. That’s just quid pro quo.

7. Kindness

If I were to define kindness, I’d say it’s the thread that binds us as humans. In all religions and all the places around the world, kindness is considered fundamental to a society’s existence. It can be expressed in various ways: helping a stranger, sharing your food with those who haven’t eaten, or even saying a few kind words to someone having a tough day. You’ll never run out of ways to express kindness if you only look hard enough.

5. Breathing

Breathing is an involuntary action. Meaning, we do it whether we are aware of it or not. It’s easy to see why we tend to take it for granted. But remember that breathing is an essential part of living. Without it, well, you know what would happen. So appreciate every day that you’re still able to breathe. You never know when you won’t be able to.

6. Having Food to Eat

If you’re not hungry right now and have food on your fridge or your table, then consider yourself lucky. According to the World Health Organization, there are around 820 million people globally who don’t have enough to eat.

7. A Place to Call Home

You may not like your home right now. Maybe it’s too small or too tacky for you. But remember that there are 1.6 billion homeless people around the world. They sleep in the cold pavements, under the bridge, or in public parks. They’re vulnerable to the elements and often fall victim to crimes. So if you have a roof over your head and a place to call home, don’t ever take it for granted.

8. Access to Clean Water

Most of us have access to clean drinking water all our life that we often fail to appreciate it. But if you’ve ever been stranded outdoors or in a place with no potable water readily available, you’ll appreciate having clean water to drink.

9. Being Able to Read

The fact that you’re reading this right now shows you are far better off than 773 million people around the world. Being able to read opens a door of opportunities. It gives you access to the world and all the knowledge it has to offer. Unfortunately, we often take this ability for granted because everyone we know can read. But if you think being able to read is no big deal, imagine what life is like if you can’t.

10. Your Family

Our family may not be our most favorite people on the planet but we know that they have our back when the going gets rough. It’s perhaps because of this that we tend to take them for granted. But having a family and people we can rely on in times of need is something that many people can only wish for.

5. Lower Your Pride

Most of the time, when we apologize, we tend to put the blame on others instead of owning up to our mistakes. This is pride at work.

If you really want the other person to feel your sincerity, lower your pride. Accept that you are not perfect and that you are also capable of making mistakes. Instead of blaming others for your bad decisions, own up to it. It doesn’t hurt to say, “I was wrong. I’m sorry.” Well, apart from a bruised ego of course. But you’ll survive.

6. Avoid Making Excuses

Making excuses for your mistakes is just as bad as putting the blame on others. When you apologize, just apologize. Don’t try to make excuses. If you do, you are justifying your actions instead of asking for forgiveness. How, then, can the other person forgive you?

7. Listen to Their Side of the Story

Making an apology should be a two-way street. You air your side but you should also give the other person a chance to say their piece too. Listen to their side of the story and understand how they feel. Who knows, it might give you a fresh perspective of the situation.

8. Put Yourself in the Other Person’s Shoes

Sometimes, we only want to make amends with someone because we know we’ve hurt them. But we have no idea how much hurt we’ve caused until we put ourselves in their shoes. Try to see things from their point of view.

If they’ve done to you everything you’ve done to them, how would you have felt? If you are on the receiving end of the apology you’re making right now, will you find it in your heart to forgive?

9. Ask How You Can Make Things Right

After you’ve apologized, ask the other person how you can make things right. This will let them know that you really mean to make up for what you did.

10. Give The Other Person Time and Space to Process Your Apology

If saying sorry is hard, accepting one is even harder. You can’t expect someone to forgive you just because you apologized. Especially if they went through some really bad things because of you. You need to give them time and space to accept your apology. Don’t pressure them to answer right away. It may take months or years so you need to be patient. Remember that they are going through a process of their own too.

11. Give Them Time to Heal

If the person you’ve hurt accepts your apology, that doesn’t mean that things can go back to the way they were. Healing, whether physical or emotional, takes time especially if the wound is too deep. If they forgave you, be grateful for it. But don’t pressure them to just move on and act like nothing happened. Give them a chance to heal. It’s the least you can do.

12. Keep to Your Purpose

Forgiving someone takes a lot of courage. So don’t be surprised if some people just can’t find it in their hearts to forgive you. It’s their prerogative.  Don’t let it discourage you from making amends with other people. The important thing is you’ve asked for their forgiveness and are willing to change for the better.

The Depth of God’s Love and Grace

Contrary to what most people believe, God’s love is not based on a reward and punishment system. Rather, it comes with His grace.

Grace is defined as the free and unmerited favor of God. Meaning, it is heartily given. You don’t have to do anything to earn it. You will receive it whether you want to or not and whether you believe you deserve it or not. It is God’s gift to all of mankind.

God loves you. No matter who you are, where you came from, or what you did. He loves every one of us regardless of our gender, skin color, race, or economic status.

If you don’t believe me, just scan a few pages of the bible. The whole book is filled with stories and examples of the universality of God’s grace.

One such example is when Jesus talked to that Samaritan woman by the well. Another is the story of Mary Magdalene. She was regarded as a sinful woman by the people around her. Yet she became one of Jesus’ greatest disciples. The apostle Matthew was a tax collector who lined his pockets with the people’s money. Even King David was an adulterer. Yet God made great people out of them because He loved them despite their faults.

Why Do People Have to Suffer?

There is a myriad of reasons why people suffer. It could be because they lost a loved one, stuck in toxic relationships, health issues, financial issues, and so much more.

But if God loves us, why would he allow such sufferings?

The answer can be found in this bible verse:

We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. – Romans 5:3-5

With each trial, our characters are tested. We develop tolerance to sufferings and fortitude to pain. We become stronger as do our faith in Him.

For it is in our darkest times that God’s light becomes our guiding beacon. When we have nothing, he gives us hope. When the world turns its back at us, he is there for us. With each suffering, we grow closer to God.

Take for example the story of Joseph, one of the most interesting characters in the bible. As a child, he was betrayed by his brothers and was sold into slavery. While being held as a slave, he was sent to prison because of a false accusation. But in the end, he became instrumental in the prevention of a famine in the land where he was sold as a slave. He even helped his brothers who had been hit hard by the famine.

This is how God expresses his love. He won’t make your path easy. Rather, he will make your journey as difficult as it could get because it is only through such that we become stronger.

So, you see? The sufferings we go through is not a punishment. It’s not a sign that God hates us. Rather, it’s a reminder of how much he loves us.

What is a Talent?

In Jesus’ time, talent is used as a unit of weight equivalent to about 80 pounds. But when used as a currency, one talent is about 6,000 denarii – a standard Roman coin which is the usual payment for a day’s labor. So during those times, one talent is equivalent to 16 years’ worth of labor. With this, we can understand why the master was outraged when the servant didn’t make use of something that he can probably only have once in his life.

Details to Note

Throughout the parable, Jesus gives us details that give us a clue on what he wants us to take away from it. Here are some of the interpretations of several of the parables’ notable details:

The Master’s Journey

If it isn’t obvious by now, the master represents Jesus. He talks about him going on a journey which clearly is an allusion to his impending return to his father’s side. His return, obviously, refers to his second coming. The master asking his servants about what became of the talents is Jesus telling us that when he comes again, we will all have to account for what we did with what he has given us.

The Master-Servant Relationship

In Jesus’ time, it’s not uncommon for masters to entrust their servants with large sums of money. But as we’ve learned, one talent is 16 years’ worth of pay. That amounts to more than a million dollars in today’s money. With this, we can see how much trust the master has for his servants to give them such a huge sum.

On the part of the servants, they could have run away with the money. Or do what the third servant did to save them the hassle of investing the money. But they didn’t. They remained faithful to their master even when he was away and made good use of what he was given.

What We Can Learn From the Parable of the Talents

This parable may have been written thousands of years ago but that doesn’t mean it’s not relevant anymore. Yes, the concept of master and servant may have been outdated as well as most of the details in the story. But the lessons remain true no matter how many centuries have passed.

Here are some of the main takeaways we can get from the parable of the talents:

Success Is Not Possible Without Taking Risks

The third servant is a basic example of what would happen when we are too afraid to take risks. Yes, we won’t lose anything. But we will also gain nothing. In short, we can’t attain success without taking risks along the way.

In Everything That We Do, We Must Seek to Glorify God

The faithfulness of the two servants despite their master’s absence is a testament to their commitment to glorify their master. Even if he isn’t physically present, they used his given talents to do what he would have wanted them to do. The same goes for us. In everything that we do, we must seek to glorify God. We must use what he has given us according to his purpose.

Each of Us Have God-Given Talents

Just as how each servant received a different amount of talent, we too are given diverse skills and abilities. You may not be a born singer or dancer but surely there’s something you’re good at. After all, we can’t all be singers and dancers. Being good at reading other people’s emotions is a talent. Even having nice, neat handwriting is a talent. It’s up to us how to make use of that god-given talent to suit his purpose.

God’s Reward Depends on Our Effort

In the parable, the master rewarded the two servants but punished the last one. The same is true for us too. We get rewarded for the good things we do and punished for every bad action. That’s why when we do good to other people and use God’s given talent to make life better for others, we receive more blessings.